It happens to us all at one time or another, and just like my salty, muddy, winter weathered car that drives back and forth, two miles down a dirt road every day, my life has been messier than it has ever been…EVER!
When I sat down and thought about the last 15 months I counted 7, yes, SEVEN major life changes (including a cancer scare) and 5 deaths. 6 deaths if you add in a loss of a friendship. Did I say messy? Yeah, that’s what I said, but, hey, who is with me? Who else is on this roller coaster ride of life holding on, bracing for the next loopty loop? I’m not asking for sympathy or even understanding, as this is all real life, and I am positive many of you can trump my experiences with your own. Who else has been pushing, rushing, fixing and healing your own way through the months like me?
I finally got to the point that I just needed to breathe. I couldn’t do it by myself anymore, and I finally asked for help. It was the best thing I’ve ever done. With gratitude for available resources, I started getting help through the help of a local life coach and an online yoga therapist. In the last month I have finally felt like a newness has washed over me. I’ve been able to sort, prioritize and regulate my emotions. It has taken me a while to work through it all, and I must be truthful in saying that it’s not all done.
When life gets messy, this is a reminder that: 1. You’re not alone 2. There is no shame in asking for help 3. We have a resiliency that can push us through
Transparency puts us in a vulnerable place, that can be excruciating, but it can also bring us to a place where we can reconnect inside and find the wisdom that only we can find ourselves.
Today, I am feeling pretty good about it all. There are some things where opportunity has been lost to adjust, shift or change, but there is life learning that has taught me more than any book or class ever could. I’ve learned to seek and implement wise action, to not beat myself up for when I wasn’t ready, and show a special gratitude for those special friends who came along side of me to remind me that I really do know the way.
Namaste. Janay 🦋